Sunday, July 30, 2017

My Submission

It's high time I embrace that side of me and let it flourish in all its glory.

You see, this man came crashing into my world one evening... I was at Teqi's and I was horny and I wanted to get fucked before I needed to go to bed.

An IM arrived, then an invitation to dance... No, he didn't fuck me that night.

Oh, he gave me an orgasm... and a few very dark promises that left me intrigued. Not many men intrigue me.
I didn't see him again for a while... my father died and I wasn't in world much for the next couple of weeks.

And he noticed. Not just my absence... I received an offline from him asking if everything was okay. Sure, he might have read this blog. I really don't know. All I do know is that he cared enough to ask.

And that's when I knew he was going to be someone special to me.
When I came back to SL after that brief hiatus, he was there. And we talked, and we had sex, and we talked even more. He didn't demand my submission... I gave it willingly. He gives me freedom... freedom to be myself, freedom to soar... and I know he'll be right there to catch me.

Is he a dominant? Yes, he is. A rough one. Demanding? Not even a little bit. He has his rules, certainly... standards more than rules, really. He has high expectations, and why shouldn't he? I do, too. Will he punish me if I get out of line? Most certainly, but why would I get out of line?

These photos... the bruises and marks I wear... those aren't punishments. They're rewards... they're what I crave. I love to be taken the way he takes me, and he knows it. Punishment, for me, would be to have that taken from me.
There is no collar.

Well, there is, but not a locked one... one I already had that we use during moments like in these photos.

He doesn't need to place a collar around my neck, or a set of rules I must follow. I've given myself to him. Freely, without limitations, without any constraints or rules.

And I've never felt stronger. Never felt more like a woman. I speak to whomever I choose, I go wherever I choose... I fuck whomever I choose.

He lets me be the woman I want to be. He asks for no changes... there are no nods or hints, or pushes or shoves for that matter. He adores me and I feel that so deep in my bones.
Dominant man, yes. He's also a rather outspoken feminist. He dominates me because I crave the domination. It is his gift to me. We feed each other... the darkness, and yes, the light. He is unfailingly kind. Even when I'm bound, on my knees for him... he respects me, unflinchingly. I don't walk behind him... I walk beside him.

I haven't changed... not one iota. I am 100% me. That's the woman he wants. Opinionated, foul-mouthed, exasperating, hilarious, intelligent me. Submissive me, strong me.

He has a gentle, beautiful soul... and no, that isn't at odds with his dominance. He's a kaleidoscope of brilliant colors and he shares them all with me. As vulnerable as I am when I'm in chains, he is just as vulnerable with me. He trusts me, I trust him... and that grows every day as it only can with time.

We've clasped hands and taken a leap of faith together when it was something neither of us thought we were prepared for, but it's just felt so natural... so unforced.
We will have other lovers, together and separately. We won't hide our needs, our desires... we will share them. We are both of the strong belief that our real lives take precedence above all else. I am not chained to his side. Our time spend together isn't out of obligation... it's out of want. Desire.

And that desire is so much more than sexual. We talk about everything... from politics to religion to family to work to every unimportant, silly, serious topic in between. We laugh... a lot. I can be my goofy self with him and he's right there with me.

As a dear friend of his... ours... told me tonight, Michael Stewart is one of the 1% of men in Second Life. He's the full package. Flawed, certainly... and isn't that part of the package? He's a billion adjectives and a few more that haven't even been named yet.

Is this fast? It feels like it is, but it's been nearly two months now since our first dance. In Second Life time, we're practically crawling along. But every day, every single day, every single moment, I feel something new and spectacular for him.
For a long time after Hugh left, I thought that was it... that was my one and I had used up all my good juju and there was nothing left. Oh, I tried... god knows I tried... but in the end, none of those other men fit. Bits and pieces of them, sure... but the entirety of the man? No.

Not until now. It just feels... solid. Strong. Heavy... and oh-so light.

I fumbled the ball once when we were first getting to know each other. I learned a valuable lesson about the man he is... he's not one to play games, nor does he tolerate fools. He's a man of his word, and that's in short supply not just in SL, but the entire world.

He confided his only real rule to me... and no, I won't share what that is. It's not my rule to share. But I tested that rule... I pushed it... not quite to the limit because if I had, none of this would exist.

But he listened to me... he stuck it out with me. He thought I was worth it, that we were worth it, and he was right. We are worth it.
And so there you have it. My submission... my gift to him. His dominance... his gift to me.

I'm having the time of my life with this man. My boundaries... my self-imposed restraints have been freed. By me, with him.

The hand prints on my ass, my bruised breasts... the marks around my neck, and yes, the reddened cheeks on my face... I wear them with pride. They are a sign of my strength. They are badges of honor. Abusive? Hardly. Not when I'm the one begging for them. I get off on pain and I won't be ashamed of that.

The orgasms he gives me are so deep, so all-consuming. They come with the twist of a nipple, or a hand on my throat, squeezing. They come with a hard slap on my clit... and mostly with his cock buried so deep inside me that it hurts and I see stars... and fireworks... explosions and bright white lights. A fire so intense it burns through my entire body until I erupt, over and over, an earthquake, tsunami... an F5 tornado ripping me apart in a torrent of bliss... and just when I think it's subsided, he touches me and it all begins again. The lash of his hands across my breasts or the soft brush of his lips on mine... I feel nothing but bliss. I feel nothing but cherished. I feel so safe with him... I can be myself, fully, holding nothing back from him.

I am his. I am owned. I've given myself to this man... this incredible man. My master, my lover, my best friend. Mine... as I am his.

I am finally complete.

Sunday, July 23, 2017

Goddesses & Monsters

Michael and I were spending some time with a dear friend of ours this morning. She recently ended a long term relationship and was sharing some of the details about their time together.
It's not often that I actually get so enraged that I'm seeing through a haze of red fury, but I was today. There is an issue, something that just crawls right under my skin and makes me want to scream literal bloody murder. When it comes right down to it, it's what's behind the point of this entire blog. It's the reason I share myself, my sexual self, so blatantly, so openly, for the world to see. I've touched on it many times in the past, and have probably written a post about it at least once before, but I believe it's worth revisiting.

It involves our society as a whole, but I'm going to be focusing on men for right now. Don't get me wrong... women do this, too, and that's a whole nother spectrum of the issue.

Men.
Stupid, impotent, tiny-dicked, tiny-brained, insecure, vile men who... GAH... it's even hard to put into words, you guys! Men who shame women for their sexuality. Men who do their very best to get inside a woman's brain and make her feel wrong, dirty, about her sexual urges. About her need for sex, to enjoy sex.

Because women aren't supposed to enjoy sex, right? Right? A woman who enjoys sex is a whore. A slut, a floozy. She's cheap. There is something wrong with her. A woman is supposed to just lie there and take it from a man... He's an animal, after all. He can't control his urges. They're natural for a man.

But women? Oh no, our clit is their purely for decoration, right? That is, if you can even find it, amirite?
The female orgasm is nothing but a myth! These women... these tarts that allegedly enjoy sex... it's just some sort of Daddy issues, right? She's lowering herself to pretend to like being sexual. She needs help, therapy, counseling.

AND IF YOU'VE EVER THOUGHT A SINGLE ONE OF THOSE THOUGHTS IN YOUR PEANUT-SIZED BRAIN, FUCK YOU.

Seriously. Fuck you. You stupid, ignorant, repugnant, slimy shit-stain.

I dated one of you, mercifully briefly. Partnered you for a minute, even. Even looking back on it now, seeing the obvious signs of what he was doing, he almost got inside my head with it. Almost. He pushed his... moral agenda... too far, too fast, and I had a glimmer of clarity and walked away without looking back. Did he outright call me a whore? No... he was more insidious with his venom. He'd say things like, "You really should have been choosier." Mind you, he had a whole host of other issues, like getting off on watching me with other men yet thinking I was filthy for doing it and that I should go to church.

I know, right?
I escaped. A lot of really incredible, amazing women aren't so lucky. This incredible woman we spent the morning with. She had three years of a man who shamed her for wanting to be intimate with him, and being rebuffed by him and made to feel dirty because she needed it. She's... god, you guys, she's amazing. Intelligent, funny, sensual, stunning, strong... and this imbecile did everything in his power to tear her down. That fucking monster.

It is everything in my power not to track him down and put my stiletto-clad foot up his ass sideways.

How dare he? How fucking dare he? To do that to anyone, much less the woman he was supposed to love, the woman who loved him... god! She gave herself to him, and he threw it back at her in the ugliest of ways time and time again.
And let's not forget the line of every single abuser ever... "You made me do it." It's all her fault, you know? His inability to perform his manly duties... all her fault.

BULLSHIT. Bull-fucking-shit.

Guys, let me tell you something... Women ARE supposed to enjoy sex. We have a clitoris and thousands of nerve-endings that just light up like fucking Christmas trees when they're correctly manipulated. More than that, we have fucking brains, and we fucking use them and we get aroused beyond the telling of it and we have Earth-shattering, ear-splitting, back-clawing, blistering, wet orgasms. Better still? We can have as many as we fucking want. Take your refractory period and shove it up your urethra... We don't need it. You think that's a fucking accident of evolution? A mistake of God's, if that's how you chose to believe? Our ability to reach the precipice and fall over again and again and again while you're still lying there curled up in a little heap, with your empty balls, and your "babe, I need to rest..."? That's no fucking accident. That's the universe telling you that women are better fucking equipped at sex than you are.

Maybe that's it. Maybe it's jealously. Some men simply haven't evolved beyond caveman-like grunts and ass-scratching and can't move beyond the false idea that men are sexually superior to women.
The Very Definition of a Man
Thankfully, most have. See the man in these photos? That's Michael Stewart. Michael fucking Stewart. THAT is a man who utterly revels in my sexuality, just basks in it. He beams with pride at the way I express myself, the way I let myself just... drown... in our arousal. He might tie me up, beat my ass until it's black and blue, and squeeze my throat until I can't breath... because he knows that's one of the many, many keys to unleashing the... whore... inside me. He owns me. Not through force. Not through abuse. Not through demanding it. He owns me because I let him. I gave myself to him, my soul, my love, my sexuality... my complete trust because I know he treasures it. He would never try to tamp that down. He would never try to make me feel dirty or wrong because of my urges, my needs. A dominant? Yes, absolutely. In the truest sense of what that means. An abusive asshole? Not even close. A staunch feminist. A champion of women.

He's not intimidated by my sexuality. He fucking owns it.
And that's what a man is. Ladies, never, ever settle for less than that. Never. The first moment you see the signs... fucking run. Just turn tail and run like you've never run before. Don't look back. Slam that door and nail it shut. Block him. Inworld and out. Because he will try to get you back. He will realize how badly he's fucked up... but he won't change. He won't. He'll make pretty apologies and shower you in gifts and praise... but it won't be long before he's back to slipping in those little insults. The ones that make you question yourself.

Don't give him that power over you. Just don't. Heed this warning... listen to the words of women who have been there. These men are broken inside, but they will never recognize that. They will never admit to their deficiencies, their weaknesses. It will always be "you made me do this" or "if you hadn't done such-and-such"...
It is not your fault.

It. Is. Not. Your. Fault.

IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. 

I know it's not easy. I know it's hard to stand alone, to turn your backs, to not have that special someone who is all yours. I know. I do.

But please, please trust me on this... You are better alone. You are better without him.

And one day, when YOU are ready, you're going to meet someone and he will love you for everything you are. He will be proud of you, will want you walking beside him, will absolutely cherish every single thing you are. Your flaws, your weaknesses, as well as your strengths... and your urges, kinky, vanilla and everything in between. Your intelligence will be his aphrodisiac and he won't be able to keep his hands off you. And you'll glow with it, just as I am right now.

The wait is worth it. I promise. I promise.
And if you ever need a woman to talk to, I'm right here. Just ping me, anytime. I may not be available right away, but I will get with you. A friend to talk to, a shoulder to cry on, a punching bag, a sounding board. You're not alone. You are never alone.

And never, ever forget... YOU are a fucking goddess.

Sunday, July 16, 2017

Waves of Bliss

I hesitate to say this out loud because I don't want to jinx it...

But wow, is my life good right now!
Allow me to introduce you all to Jude, this delicious creature lying on top of me. Jude, everyone... everyone, Jude.

He's Nat's partner. Just so we have this all straight, we have... I have... my darling Michael, who introduced me to Nat, the stunning women from my previous blog post, and Nat introduced me to her Jude.

We clicked. I mean, we all clicked like... er... clickity-clicky things do. I've been wanting something like this for soooooooo long, you guys! An open relationship with another amazing couple where all parties are mature, intelligent, funny... sexy. A small group of extremely intimate friends who are able to communicate... to share and leave the damn drama behind and just... be.
I'm drifting... back to the story of our Saturday night!

Nat had plans out in the real world last night, as did Michael, so Jude and I were able to spend some time together getting to know one another. We were sort of the last pieces of the puzzle that needed to, um... find our fit. Michael and Nat were already lovers, Michael, Jude and Nat were already lovers, Michael and I are certainly lovers, Nat and I were well on our way... and last night, Jude and I were able to come together as well.

And it was all so beautifully organic and natural and unforced.
Jude took me sailing... and only tossed me overboard once. We talked quite a bit about everything that was going on before we even touched each other. He and Nat have been together since nearly the beginning of Second Life and I absolutely adore this amazing foundation they have together... this strength and confidence in what they have built over the years.

The utter trust and love they have is... breathtaking. Their absolute unquestionable bond is palpable. It's beautiful.

And Jude is a beautiful man... inside and out. This is someone who will be a friend, as well as a lover... just as Nat is.
As Jude and I were coming down from the tidal wave of sex on the beach, Nat came home. After some snuggling, we all dressed and went to Teqi's for a bit.

We found a couch that would allow us to be together... we've dubbed it "our couch" now... lol.

There was lots of snuggling and lots of talking... sharing... getting to know each other even better. The only piece of our beautiful mosaic that was missing was Michael... but I know he was certainly with us in spirit!
Just look at those two gorgeous people! How very lucky, and blessed, I am to know them!

Intimately.

It was odd, though... you see all sorts of people and odd combinations at Teqi's, yet I couldn't help feeling that we were being stared at... at times, it almost felt like icy daggers stabbing into me.

Or attempting to, anyway. This bitch isn't easily cut.
Whatever.

In truth, I never looked away from these two. I wasn't much interested in the other scenery at the club. I was trembling with what I was feeling... so intense and deep it was. Sparks flying all over the place, electricity arcing between the three of us.

Of course, since we were in Teqi's, Nat and I both started crashing when we were trying to snap some photos and that's just... aggravating. Not sure what it is about that place that just makes my graphics card nope out after a few minutes there. I've even derendered most of the plants and decorations and various particle effects.

HOLY SHIT! The next Dr Who is a woman!

Sorry, breaking news alert... lol.
It was time to head someplace a bit more private to... finish our evening together.

Nat and Jude took me to their boathouse. We attempted to hot tub together, but it wasn't threesome friendly so we went below decks... and got very cozy.

And I finally, finally, got my mouth on Nat's juicy little pussy.
It's been ages since I went down on a woman...

I'm just not sexually attracted to many women. I fucking love cock... and love the men attached to them. And most women that I've encountered come with heaps of drama.

But Nat... god, she's incredible.

And we had so. much. fun.
It felt so natural... organic. I keep using that word for what's happening in my life... in our lives.

It just fits. We all fit together.

It's extraordinary. I lost count of the orgasms these two beautiful souls gave me last night. Mouths, cocks, fingers... god!
That's me grinding on Jude's face, having about the elebenty-bazillionth orgasm of the night, thanks to his tongue... and long fingers in my tight little ass...

shivers

We capped off the evening by sharing Jude's cock... sucking, stroking, kissing... until he shattered, coating us both with thick ropes of cum... it was divine.
Cleaning off his cock, cleaning each other... sharing his delicious taste, his seed... kissing Nat, passing it back and forth between us...

Perfection. Utter and absolute perfection.
One final cuddle pile before I had to crawl off to my bed, on very shaky legs...

Sated and spent and floating on waves of bliss.

I am a very lucky woman, indeed.

Friday, July 14, 2017

Beautiful Girls

Same pose, twelve angles...
I have a new friend. Isn't she gorgeous?

My new fella introduced us... and I'm immeasurably thankful.
In spite of this pose, we don't know each other all that well... yet. But I can already tell that she's sane, and that's a pretty big deal when talking about female friends.

Because, let's face it, with women comes drama. I get enough of that in real life... my sister, my friends, my coworkers... and yes, I am a woman, too, so I can say that.
It's in our DNA, I think. And though we often keep that hidden away from sight in the real world, it's easier to let our bitchiness and lunacy shine through in SL.

Nat, though, is not only stunning, funny and smart... she's also mature. And not in the way 22 year olds think they're mature. She's mature in the way that a woman who has lived and knows that drama is utterly senseless and unnecessary with good communication and openness.
So yeah, I like her. A lot. And I'm very much looking forward to getting to know her and her partner much better... in all sorts of delicious ways.

Whether it's just talking, or rolling around the sheets, or shopping or posing for a sexy photo (or twelve!) I know it'll be fun and relaxing... and arousing.
You know I'm not really into women in a sexual way. I don't consider myself bisexual at all.

But sometimes a woman comes along, someone I just click with. And I know that our men will not only approve, but join us as well.
And isn't that what SL is all about? Making friends, making lovers...?

Oh sure, I know there is a literal world of other things to do in Second Life, but that's not the primary focus of my SL.
This is my fun time... my relaxing time. My time to shut out all the distractions and problems in the real world.

It's not a game... it's never a game. But it is a place to immerse myself for a few hours and forget all the rest of the things.
And have orgasms. Lots and lots of them.

Kinky ones, vanilla ones, multiple ones... ALL THE ORGASMS!

Without turning it into some histrionic form of art. It doesn't need to be a Shakespearean drama. It doesn't have to be a dramedy.
It can just be... fun.

And there's not a thing wrong with that.

Of course, when you grow close to people, unless you're an asshole, you experience their joys and their pains. Because you care about them, and you learn about their lives within SL, and outside of it, too.

And that's beautiful as well.
But when it becomes all too heavy, and all too much drama and intrigue, and it's created and manufactured within the confines of Second Life... then no.

When everything is bitchy words about someone else, and all he said/she said bullshit, it might just be time to walk away.
But... from what I can tell so far, Nat isn't one of those girls.

Because she is a woman, and not a little girl playing games for the sake of game-play.
And we're going to enjoy this to the nth degree. 

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

The Dominant Male

I had other topics I wanted to write about today.

I did.

I had a bunch of stuff I wanted to write about. I was going to talk about the normalization of the sexualization of children in SL through hentai, kawaii and all that shit. I also wanted to talk about how much I hate the 4th of July because it's terrible for pets AND nothing to celebrate since we have Trump Jung-Un in office.
But I just don't feel like getting into anything heavy today, so I'm putting all that on hold.

I'm trying a new, paler skin... what do you think? I have a lover that likes pale women so I'm giving it a go. It's still not terribly pale, I know, but anything lighter than this just looked weird to me. Baby steps, right? Perhaps once I get used to this, I'll take another step lighter. 

I like it, though. 
It's going to make bruises really visible...

Did you all know I'm a pain slut? I hate that nomenclature, though. I guess masochist works just as well, doesn't it?

That sounds so extreme, though. Anyone who has ever had sex with me knows I can get off on pleasure just as easily as I do pain.

But I do like the pain. Love the feeling of being... taken. Used. Not so much forced, though that can be delicious, too, but... just having a man who isn't afraid to handle me roughly. A man who frees his inner beast with me (as long as he doesn't actually start howling like a wolf - yes, I had that happen recently) and just gets utterly primal with me. Raw. Brutal.
A man who isn't shy about using his belt on me, or a whip. Or a cane. 

shivers

NOT to be mistaken with a man who enjoys humiliating or abusing women. There is a difference. A big difference. And if you have to have that explained to you, there is a good chance that you just won't get it. 

Yes, I'm talking to you, men-who-call-themselves-doms-in-SL. Most of them, anyway. A truly dominant man doesn't need to wear a label. He just is. He doesn't have a checklist of requirements copied straight out of BDSM For Dummies on his profile.

He doesn't insist on being called "Master". He doesn't need to... he knows he is. Actually, he probably doesn't even think of himself in those terms at all. He just knows who he is, is comfortable in his own skin, confident in his masculinity and his sexuality.
And he loves strong women. Respects them. Admires them and surrounds himself with them. They're drawn to him, the essence of him. He considers intelligence an aphrodisiac.

He isn't trying to break a woman - he's encouraging her to spread her wings and fly. He's giving her a safe haven to open herself to him, to be everything she can be, with him.

He knows there is strength in submission, that it is a gift to revel in, and never take for granted. He isn't afraid to show his emotions, his passion, his respect and admiration, and yes, love. He knows it isn't a weakness.
He doesn't need to force a woman to her knees... No, with a man who is a true dominant, she kneels willingly, joyously.

For him.

She wants to make him proud. She isn't a snotty little brat, she doesn't try to push him, to make him punish her.

She doesn't think being a bitch is an attractive trait. She walks tall, and proudly. She doesn't look at the ground, she looks up... she meets his eyes.

Together, they are a force of nature. And he gets the pieces of her that are inaccessible to anyone other than him.
At least, that's my definition of a dominant man. I'm sure it's different for others, and I suppose that's okay, but... I also tend to think that the men and women who are into humiliation and degradation (as well as the daddy dom/baby girl lifestyle) probably have some deep psycho-sexual issues that need to be worked out with through therapy.

But that's just me.

Huh... okay, I went off on a little tangent there, didn't I? And yes, as you may suspect, I've met someone. And that's really all I'm prepared to share for now.
It has lead me to make some interesting new purchases, though. I'm now the owner of a boob slapper and an ass slapper. It's cool... it reddens gradually with each slap. He is the only one able to spank me, though, so if  you see me out in a club, don't even try it. I've asked the creator to make a snatch slapper, too... lol. I hope she does! I've also got some nice little choking marks to go around my throat when he puts his big hand around my neck and squeezes while he's thrusting deep inside me.

I made another new purchase that I haven't had a chance to try yet. A full body cum system, controlled by him. Apparently, when he ejaculates, he'll be able to decide where he's cumming on my body, and it will be visible. 

And not removable by me until I either take a shower, a dip in the water, or use a special towel to wipe it off myself. Can't wait to see how well it works!

And no, he didn't ask or order me to buy any of this stuff. He might even think it's goofy, I don't know. The important thing is that it was my idea, and my choice.
So yeah... Happy Blow Shit Up, Terrify the Pets, and Rue the Day We Won the Revolutionary War Day!

PS - I bet Donald Trump thinks he's a dominant male. I also bet I could bring him to his knees and have him crying like a little girl in under two minutes flat.

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